CS Humor
(More blog entries from bbirney)
1. Ever notice how fast Windows runs? Neither did I.
2. Double your drive space. Delete Windows.
3. "Very funny, Scotty. Now beam down my clothes."
5. Logic: The art of being wrong with confidence
6. To iterate is human; to recurse, divine.
7. If at first you don't succeed, call it version 1.0
8. Maintenance free: when it breaks, it can't be fixed.
9. God is Real unless explicitly declared an Integer.
10. Asking if computers think is like asking if submarines can swim."
11. From C:\*.* to shining C:\*.*
12. AAAAAA - American Association Against Acronym Abuse Anonymous
13. CCITT - Can't Conceive Intelligent Thoughts Today.
14. Good programming is 99% sweat & 1% coffee.
15. To define recursion, we must first define recursion.
16. Never forget 2 + 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2.
17. My program can beat up your program.
18. Programming: the art form that fights back.
19. Backups? We doan NEED no steenkingg baX%^^~,VbKx NO CARRIER
20. Today's assembler command: EXOP Execute Operator
21. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
22. Oops. My brain just hit a bad sector.
23. I used to have a handle in life. Then it broke.
24. We have enough youth. How about a fountain of SMART?
25. C program run. C program crash. C programmer quit.
26. Is reading in the bathroom considered parallel processing?
27. My computer isn't that nervousjust a bit ANSI.
28. Honey, I formatted the kid.!
29. Your e-mail has been returned due to insufficient voltage.
30. Who is General Failure and why is he reading my disk?
31. Multi-tasking: screwing up several things at once
32. Stack error: lost on a cluttered desk.
33. Stack overflow: too many pancakes.
34. Capt'n! The compiler kinna take dis abuse!
35. ASCII to ASCII, DOS to DOS.
36. How do I set my laser printer on stun?
37. Thought for the day: Calm down. It's only ones and zeroes.
38. "..now touch these wires to your tongue."
39. Computer analyst to programmer: "You start coding. I'll go find out what they want."
40. According to my calculations, the problem doesn't exist.
41. RAM DISK is not an installation procedure.
42. The generation of random numbers is too important to be left to chance.
43. Bug? That's not a bug, that's a feature. T. John Wendel
44. If debugging is the process of removing bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in. -Dykstra
45. "#define QUESTION ((bb) || ! (bb)) - Shakespeare
